Living In A World Without Pity

Rob Nielsen
4.15.08

Many Bruce Springsteen fans rate “Human Touch” as one of his worst albums. Though I wouldn’t be quite as harsh, I’ll admit I don’t particularly like many of the songs myself, except for the title track, which is one of my favorites. The meaning is highly debated, and knowing the luck of other famous misinterpretations of Springsteen’s songs (i.e. Ronald Regan), I won’t guarantee I’m totally right, but this is how I see it judging by my understanding of the song’s lyrics. The song details two people, seeing how brutal people can be in relationships with all the deceit, the backstabbing and the lies, be it friends or even just acquaintances, and trying to find some kind of solace in each other.

Over the past few months I’ve taken this song to heart much more than I had in the past because I have seen the theme of this song played before my very eyes in so many cases. The lines “Girl, ain’t no kindness in the face of strangers,” and “Ain’t no mercy on the streets of this town,” seem like reality rather than just words today.

First I begin with a short disclaimer. I’m not trying to use this story to convey a message  stating that everybody should love each other. I’m well aware that we won’t all get along with each other. We aren’t all going to be friends and we won’t all come together on every issue. We’ll always have disagreements. And some people truly make themselves out to be undesirable through their own actions. But I am tired of people going around and talking behind other people’s backs and erecting a welcoming façade when that person is around. At the same time that I criticize those who have passed judgment behind another’s back, I must admit that I too have done it. I’m not perfect and neither is anyone else. It’s not something I’m proud of, though. The goal of this article is to at least make people think about what they say a little more closely.

This story started to formulate over the last few months of debate competitions. A few of our competitors took a particular dislike toward one of the other debaters from another school. This wasn’t totally confined to people from our school either. I’d always hear about how she wasn’t all that good, how she’s too liberal, how she’s too extreme, how she’s disrespectful. And, granted, I didn’t agree with her getting angry with a fellow competitor for his views. However, just a few weeks ago I attended the national qualifier, and when I found out I’d be sharing the same student congress with her, I didn’t know what to expect. I’ll tell you I was surprised. She did very well. She had evidence to back up her arguments, and in regular conversation she seemed like a nice person. In the end I voted her first place. This fact caused me to receive a few laughs and “You’re Kiddings” from some of my classmates, but in the end, I stuck with that decision. Every accusation I’d heard about her was proven wrong in those seven hours.

The next one was a real personal hit on me despite not being directly insulted myself. I requires a bit of background information going back to my eighth-grade year. Back then I was a bit more reclusive and I endured a little verbal abuse from people, though I’ve managed to move on and forgive the nonsense. One of these people stood out to me though and as a result I held it against him for years. Then a few years ago I happened to be in one of the same the same classes as his girlfriend. At first I couldn’t believe it. But as the days and weeks went on I started to realize she was very intelligent. It led me to the conclusion that maybe in my haste to judge and criticize, I hadn’t realized that maybe this person isn’t so bad. Thanks to meeting and getting to know this girl, I started my own evaluation of how I look at people. The girl was very helpful to me and I will always credit her for helping me to become a better person.

Then came an event within the last few days that angered me to the point where I had to write this column. In one of my classes, she somehow came up in conversation between me and a few classmates. They told me that she was a whore, point blank. And when I tried to defender her, I was told I “really” don’t know her. Contrary to what they said, I do know her. And I know that’s not her. I’ve been the target of rumors like this before and I will say it’s not a lot of fun. To perpetuate a rumor like this about someone despite a lack of evidence and truth is just offensive not only to me, but to anyone with a decent bit of common sense. And on top of all that, it’s absolutely pointless. There is, in any case, no gain whatsoever in the senseless defamation of others.

Even with the two examples I’ve just mentioned and countless incidents that have gone unmentioned, I’ll say that none of the people mentioned above are bad people. In most cases they are friends of mine, and they are good people from what I have seen. The willingness to criticize behind one’s back or gossip is a character flaw that affects most, if not all, of us. However, we tend to continue exploiting this flaw because we give little consideration to the other person. As I stated earlier, just because someone is your friend doesn’t mean they have to like your other friends. This story is more or less to say that we all, as a people, need to give a bit more consideration toward others. No matter what, there will be a constant in all of the examples I’ve just presented as well as related stories. The person who is the target of this backstabbing and these rumors is just that: a person. And just as everyone else, even they want to “feel a little of that human touch” as well.